RandomStan

Ahoy-hoy.  The first album has been uploaded to the new Photo Gallery.

As much as it appeals to run my entire photo collection from my Windows Home Server, the add-in I’m using doesn’t present the nicest or most intuitive interface.  See the old collection here…

The other downside was that I couldn’t easily link to any particular album or photo.

Yes – I know there are services like Flickr out there – hey, I was using it years ago before I abandoned it, as evidenced here.

However, as a self-appointed Grand Poobah of [mostly Microsoft] Technology Evangelism, I try and stick to the Microsoft-powered alternatives if at all possible/practical.

Windows Live has reached the stage where I am now able to do that.  My blogging is done through Windows Live Writer and my photo editing and tagging is through Windows Live Photo Gallery.

Although Photo Gallery supports Flickr and the like, I do very much appreciate the tight integration between Microsoft’s desktop software and their online services.

So, I can pick any folder:

Tag and caption it:

And then publish the whole album:

Hey presto – one on-line album.

OK – so there are many tools out there, but I like having everything from my Messenger profile to my blog and photos to even my Xbox profile all linked to one place.  :)

Anyway – my very first album (taken wayyy back in mid-2000) has been published.  As I get around to tagging and cleaning my other photos, they too will be uploaded.  So watch this space…

It has been nearly a quarter of a year since my last blog, and even then that was a feeble attempt of a blog posting (essentially a “hello there, I’ve been too busy to blog” post).

So – a bit of a reboot is required, and I need to get into the habit of being both rude and inane once again.  No doubt due to my lack of a blogging outlet, I’ve been an incredibly grumpy sod in recent months – annoying co-workers, family and friends.

Ah well.

Not much to report, really.  But given how Windows Live has evolved in my time away, I may revisit the idea of (re-)publishing my photos on the web.  Not that you have much need to see photos of me in various states of nudeness but – quite honestly – photos of anything else just bore me.

Wow – a month-and-a-half since my last posting…?

How time flies when you’re having fun!  Wait…  I’m not having fun.  Bah – old proverbs are wrong and shit, apparently.

Anyhoo – I am alive.  I have been somewhat busy – trying to get our company restructure sorted, and essentially rebooting parts of the business.  As usual – ever optimistic that shuffling some paper around and creating whole new tasks lists will change things for the better… :)

I will try and blog a bit more regularly, again.  Perhaps not once a day (that’s doomed to failure), but maybe once or twice a week…

Stuff in my head I need to spill out include:

• Installing and running Windows 7 on my shiny new HP 2730p Tablet PC
• Completing my 30 Years of Life postings – truly a worthlessly epic tale of self-love and self-loathing!
• Random ranting
• Parties ahoy – my aim this year is to organise three small parties/piss-ups, and one spectacular mega-Party either sometime late Spring or early Autumn…

That’s it, really.  Right – back to work, but watch this space…  It’s even less exciting than watching paint dry.  (Ooo… a proverb that’s actually right!)

I’m feeling quite lazy today, so Part C is going to be a brief instalment.  Hey – at least I’m making an effort.  I should have a bit of time over the weekend, so expect long-winded essays then…  As with yesterday, I’m going to cheat a little…

Positive Fact C

I’m extremely immature and good (if somewhat dirty) humoured.  I don’t tend to take things very seriously at all.

I’d like to think that this fosters some kind of enjoyable work environment – I’ve yet to be hauled in front of the courts for helping to create an expletive-ridden, dirt-mongering office environment.  Only today, I was encouraging work colleagues to search the Internet for reviews on Aberdeen whores.  The scary thing is, we (or rather, I – I don’t wish to taint anyone else in the office here) managed to find some cursory reviews, including one girl who is “alleged to be the dirtiest cock sucker in the world – advance booking recommended”! (the totally work-unfriendly link is here).

Maybe not a well-known fact, but I do enjoy reverting into extremely childish moods at times.  I enjoy the whole universe of Pokémon – in fact I have a number of these plush toys adoring my office and at home.  The Animaniacs are my other passion – my first company was named after the location they lived in, and all of the PCs I’ve owned since starting business has invariably been named after one of the characters on the show.  I have pretty much all their soundtracks, and am occasionally prone to singing aloud to them in the car (which must be a completely mad sight – a chubby oriental-type sitting in an obscenely expensive Audi RS 6, singing along to the kiddie-oriented Be Careful What you Eat song as sung by the Warner Brothers (and Warner sister)).

The net effect is that I probably spend half my time acting like a 10 year old, and really enjoying it.  Life’s too short to take seriously all the time – kick back, and have laid-back and innocently-humoured fun!

Negative Fact C

Alas – my utter immaturity and childishness rubs some people the wrong way.  I suspect that there may be a few people within the IT industry who might view me as being totally insane, especially given my entirely retarded behaviour at parts of the Microsoft Worldwide Partner Conference earlier this year.  I am also perhaps not the most professional representative of our company, as evidenced by what I get up to at professional training courses – that was no random freebie junket, but a £3,500 course paid for with company money…!

Yes – I know that my colleagues sometimes despair at the utter lack of self-control I have, and I have no doubt are sometimes faintly embarrassed on my behalf.  I know that my childish antics have certainly knocked back my professional credibility a bit.

It’s all about getting a decent balance between having fun and enjoying work, and remaining professional enough to perform the work and to instil confidence within work colleagues, clients and partners.  Although I’m having a ton of irreverent fun, I’ve obviously not got this balance right, and I suspect the business suffers because of this… :(

So – part 2, er “Part B” of my 30-part epic.  Sweepstakes already abound as to how many posts I manage to make before I get bored and give up!

I’ll cheat a little today…

Positive Fact B

I have a very organised, very methodical and logical mind.  Every major decision I make comes down to hours of logical thinking and fine-tuning.  It’s why I’m such a great fit in the IT industry (although, strangely, no idea why I’m such a terrible coder).  I can very carefully visualise how entire networks and functionality is built, and how they all inter-depend or inter-relate with each other.

It also means that I rarely make decisions I regret.  That’s not to say that I don’t screw up – I do, and I sometimes do spectacularly.  But – the risk has always been considered, and I’m never really bitten in the ass by any decision that I have thought through.  Even some recent business-related issues – although unpleasant and inconvenient – was not a surprise, and the risk was considered beforehand (I could have handled it better, in hindsight, but again – no real regret with how things have gone).

So – no rash decisions, then, and very few regrets on business and work-related decisions that I make.  Happy days.

Negative Fact B

As I said, I’m cheating today.  So – today’s negative fact about my life is the fact that I have a very organised, very methodical and logical mind.  Déjà vu?

Alas – all that planning, forethought and preparation means I have very little time to actually spend committing to a task that I have spent ages planning.  Sometimes, the opportunity has flown right by before I’ve made up my mind.

Minor case in point – today, while at the gym, I was incredibly desperate for a pee whilst on the X-Trainer.  My dilemma was – should I interrupt my training program on the X-Trainer, head down for a pee, then come back and try to resume my exercise?  Or should I risk holding it in, with an escape plan on standby should I have an “accident”?  I spent a good 11-12 minutes debating it either way, and also formulating the best, most discrete way of quickly wandering away should I momentarily lose bladder control.  In just under a quarter-of-an-hour, my routine on the X-Trainer was pretty much complete anyway, making my whole thought process moot, as I had to hang on for another couple of minutes before leaving.  Yes – it actually took me so long to come to a decision that I ran the high risk of public humiliation, as well as rendering my dilemma moot through the passage of time.

On a professional basis, I have possibly one of the most complex task-management systems ever.  I have a whole notebook in Microsoft Office OneNote dedicated to managing my business goals.  My current professional tasks span 5 tabs, each holding anywhere up to 30 pages, and each page containing up to 50 tasks (although, on average, anywhere between 10-25 task).  Yes – I’m not exaggerating when I say that I have planned for myself, an overall to-do list of over 5,000 tasks.

My greatly logical mind creates big overarching goals (say, renew Microsoft Partner registration for 2009), which is broken down into smaller tasks (say, renew Information Worker competency), which is then broken down into yet another sub-task (complete 3 client references), which is still yet broken down into a smaller task (complete client reference for XYZ Limited).  This huge task “book” takes a couple of hours every day to tend and update.

All of this is linked to Microsoft Office Outlook, which I use to manage the atomic tasks (that is, tasks that cannot be broken down any further and are my “next step” items).  These are the tasks that I sync to my phone, and which I try to perform on a daily basis.  In order to ensure that I do tasks, I then link each task item as a calendar item in my diary, thus (in my mind), scheduling an item to be done at a particular time.

Excellent – my mind says.  However, I’ve just burned through pretty much a whole morning managing my business tasks, and any unforeseen interruption (say, a quick 20 minute chat with one of the guys in the office, or an unplanned phone call), and my elaborate plan all falls to pieces and I spend ages rescheduling and re-prioritising.

Yes – it’s shit, and  I need to find a way to be more effectual.  The other thing that galls me around this?  I also have an equivalent for my personal life and personal interests, but rarely visit that due to lack of time.  It is somewhat disheartening to look at my personal life, and see how stagnant it has become both in terms of self-development/self-improvement, and how totally unbalanced my business/personal life is.

Rather than numbering things, I’m going to use letters.  It’ll be interesting to see what happens when I reach the end of the alphabet as, last time I checked, there weren’t 30 of the blasted things (letters, that is).

Anyway – this is the first blast at my self-imposed introspection…  30 positive and 30 negative things about my life, eh…?  Let’s get the ball rolling with some fairly frank open statements:

Positive Fact A

I’m a very frank and open person.  I say, and blog, about a lot of things.  Usually highly inappropriate things.  I don’t really care what other people think about my statements or opinions (which is either a shining example of being truly open-minded, or is sheer bloody-minded selfishness – I like to think of it as the former).

Despite appearances to the contrary – there are a number of things I still keep private (a topic for another day), and that I only discuss with my very close inner circle (yet another topic – but to keep you guessing – my inner circle isn’t composed of people).

However, for the most, I’m quite happy to express my opinion – be they welcome or otherwise.  There is no topic I won’t broach – and I’m quite happy to offend people with my thoughts (again, another blog post for the future).

So yes – it’s not that I have no shame.  It’s just that, well, I see very little point in keeping secrets.  People either like you, and your opinions, or they don’t.  There’s no point hiding or, even worse, lying about who you are in order to gain more “friends” – what a pointless exercise.  I am who I am (a topic of a previous post), and I don’t see any point in pretending otherwise, or inhibiting yourself just because society says so (although, yet again, another topic for another day).

Being so open…?  Positive, in my book.

Negative Fact A

Well, if I’m such an open-minded individual, able to speak about any topic, let’s open with a belter.  Or maybe not, as I’m sure most people have suspicions anyway, if I haven’t already outright confirmed it.  I am, or will shortly be, a 30-year old virgin.

Yep – currently, I’ve done it with ladies, gents, dogs, sheep, dolphins or anything else as often as I’ve done it with Her Majesty the Queen.  That is to say, I have not yet done the deed.  Not even come close.

I have (what I think) are principled reasons as to why my life has been void of any sexual activity.  However, reasons aside (and yes, they are also forthcoming topics on my 30-day blog epic), I have to admit that, now that I’m well over the peak of sexual prowess, I wonder if perhaps I’ve left things quite (too?) late.

I’m at the stage now where, with hindsight, I’m of the opinion that I should have been engaging in the hanky-panky quite some time ago.

So yes.  For the record – I do regret not having tried hard enough (or tried at all, if I’m brutally honest).  It’s not as if it appears that difficult – given what I see goes on in town on a Friday or Saturday evening.

Having said that, I’m still principled enough to not go out and just pay for some action.  Heck – I imagine what I spend on petrol a month on my car could more than buy some, er, other form of entertainment.  But, well, that’s not just me.

You never know, though.  After 30 days of introspection, perhaps I’ll throw caution to the wind and go all-out on a mad whore-guzzling binge with fistfuls of cash.  However, I suspect not.

Wow.  Has it been nearly a month since I last blogged?

Well – I’ve been busy.  It’s probably a few blog posts in itself, but it’s been a messy few months, and I’m just trying to get organised.  Needless to say, I stuffed up and am now running about like a headless chicken, trying to get everything on an even keel again.

Which neatly leads into the main topic of this particular posting.

I’m near to hitting the ripe old age of 30, and people have been asking why I haven’t organised a birthday bash of some sort…  It’s because, long-term, I think I’ve stuffed up, and really need to get things in shape.

Not to piss all over everyone else’s 30th birthdays (there’s been a spate of these this year due to all my similarly-aged university acquaintances), but I personally don’t feel that birthdays are major events.  Now don’t get me wrong – there are folk out there who enjoy having a bash, and it’s a nice excuse to get some far-flung friends together for a party.  However, a birthday – to me – is about celebrating achievements.  Let’s face it – unless you’re particularly stupid, careless or horrendously unfortunate, then getting to 30 years of age is hardly a difficult achievement.  We should be striving to achieve great things (within our means), not sitting back in satisfaction at the mere passage of time.

So – achievements, then.  Alas – looking at the last 30 years, I’d give myself a C grade in terms of what I hoped to achieve by this stage.

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m not bitter, or complaining, about the standard of my life.  Overall, it’s very nice – and I’m certainly very fortunate to be in the tiny percentile of folk around the world who do not need to worry about basics such as food or shelter.

However, given the environment, opportunities and education I have been fortunate enough to receive – well, I’ve done a pretty piss-poor job of building upon all of this.  I’m not talking specifically about any financial goals (although they are fairly important), but – at this particular moment, I can’t single out any particular thing that I’ve done in recent times that I’m really proud of as an achievement.  It’s fairly, well, disappointing.

All due to a lack of effort on my part, though – it’s not like I’ve been really pushing to do something charitable, or have made any great effort to earn a fortune.  I’ve been coasting along so far, which has been enjoyably relaxed and entertaining.  But with some hindsight, I wonder if perhaps I’ve squandered 30 years of opportunity…?

I’m sure everyone gets this feeling when they hit the “middle-age” band, and I’m certainly going through this now.

But as I said – this isn’t really a rant.  More of a chance for some in-depth introspection.  I had an idea around the blog that I’ll try over the next period…

Given that I’m nearly 30 years of age, I thought it might be an interesting exercise over the next 30 days to post what I feel are 30 positive, and 30 negative, aspects of my life – one of each per day.  This takes me nicely into the New Year, which is quite well-timed.

Other than the first couple of thoughts – I have no idea what I’m going to write.  I’ll make it up as I go along…  It’ll be a long process but, at the end of this, I’ll hopefully have a better idea of what I’ve achieved in life, and what can be improved.  If you have the patience/boredom to read all of it, you might get to know me a little better as well.

So… here goes…

As a closing note – I have to say that I am both impressed, and appalled, by how the American feel the need to jazz up the elections.

Other than the over-the-top CGI and poll monitoring (very reminiscent of Brass Eye parodies of such graphics), It thought the most ridiculous tool to illustrate the vote count was the “ice-rink map” at Election Plaza (a stupid name in itself).  Behold…

Really – is there any need to represent an electoral map on ice, with real water dyes?!?

That is, indeed, an angry hand gesture being made to express the, well, complete wank-job that this map is.

Right – it is now 5.35am.  Having spent the last 6.5 hours in front of various streams from the web covering the election, I am now officially pooped.  See you when I recover from the alcohol poisoning!

Listening to Obama’s speech at the moment.  Truly great – I’m very glad he hasn’t made much (if anything) about the fact that he is black.

He is speaking about working to improve America.  He is setting expectations – he has claimed that there will be unpopular policies, that some issues will take more than a year, or a term, to sort.

I admire how he has coined a new catchphrase: “Yes, we can!” – nice sound-bite that resonates with the general public…

Am I being too drunkenly cynical, and poo-poo-ing what is clearly a momentous occasion for African-Americans?  I see that Rev Jesse Jackson and Oprah Winfrey are in tears at the fact that a black man is going to be the next President.  Maybe this is a great occasion for them…?   But still – surely it is about the policies and beliefs of the man, and not his colour or upbringing?

Still – great speech, and very inspiring.  The message is still very on-note – America needs change, and America can make change happen…

What the hell?!?

As if to emphasise my point about race, the press has randomly started to cover a small town in Kenya, where they are celebrating the fact that a black man has made it into the White House.

Yeah – never mind his policy about economic recovery, international relations (especially around Iraq and Afghanistan) and internal reform.

This is apparently about “equality”, about “decency”, about “forgiving past transgressions” – i.e. it’s all about race.

Pah, say I.  Stop cheapening this.  I really hope he won because of what he believes in, not because of what colour he is.

So – about 5 minutes have passed since Obama has won.

Great concession speech from McCain – graciously admits defeat, and is concerned with unity of the country above all else.

However – the whole election is, to my mind, cheapened by the whole emphasis that a black man has won.

Don’t get me wrong – it is great to see such a momentous event.  However, MSNBC has wheeled out the likes of John Lewis, the Rev Jesse Jackson – who only spoke about the fact that a black man has won the Presidential race.

So it comes down to race, does it?  No-one so far has mentioned anything about his policies, his belief, his personality.  It’s all been about race.  Come on – it’s great that a black person has entered the White House – but is it really the be-all-and-end-all?  More important than policy?

I find it, well, disheartening that the defining thing about the most powerful man in the world is around his race, rather than his beliefs or policies or political stance.  It feels, well, cheapening to his victorious win.  Race should be secondary to what he stands for (other than colour), and this is transpiring not to be the case, given the current media coverage.

Maybe that’s what our civilisation stands for now – the easiest, simplest sound-bite or simple characteristic.  Who cares about what he stands for, eh?  He’s black, for heavens sake.

At least… that what it feels like…

But despite my reservations about genuinely why he won (colour rather than policy), I’m glad he has won – I think he will be a brilliant President and will help repair a lot of the damage done in recent years.

WTF?!?

Wandered back, to find that Obama has won!

Yippee, I guess – but hell, I’m going to be drunk!  Don’t the American people know what they’re doing to me?!?

Besides that – I am well-pleased.

I maintained, even back in the days when Obama was running against Hillary Clinton, that Obama would be the next US President – I certainly hoped he would be, because I believed he had a sound mind, sensible policies (especially in his attitude to international relationships), and was a charismatic person.

So – well done Obama.  However, curse you, for getting me drunk so quickly!

Too…  Much… Alcohol…

I’ve already imbibed 15 shots, and some extra alcohol on the side, and feel fairly drunk.  Need to take a break!

We wandered out for a quick walk, as we’re both fairly tired and drunk, and need some fresh air.

Passed by a charity shop, where someone dumped an exercise bike.

Seizing the chance to burn off some excess alcohol – we temporarily “borrowed” it to burn off some booze…

Oh dear.  Big updates have just occurred…

I have to quickly down 6 additional shots of Port, unfortunately…

OK – so I’ve agreed to a drinking competition geared around the US elections, as it’s a nice way of making politics interesting…!

As of 11pm, we’ve been following the US elections – three streaming feeds provide us with the polling results – MSNBC, BBC News and Sky News.

Quick rules are as follows:

1. The tally from MSNBC is treated as the official count.  The votes are being read differently by different networks.  However – any news team that uses Microsoft Surface to show election results must surely know what they’re speaking about (plus, their CGI graphics look the best).
2. Although we nominally agreed that we’d have one shot per State, we worked out this may not be for the best (for some States are worth more votes than others, thanks to proportional representation).  So – with 270 votes to win the race for Presidency, we’ve agreed to have one shot per 15 votes.  Therefore, a maximum of 18 shots will be drunk by the eventual loser.
3. I’m representing the Republicans and McCain.  So – for every 15 electoral votes that Obama wins, I will need to down one shot.
4. My rival is representing the Democrats and Obama.  Accordingly, for every 15 electoral votes that McCain wins, he will have to drink a shot.
5. As there are a potentially large number of shots (at least 18 for the loser), we’ve settled on Taylor’s Port as the initial drink of choice.  This may run out fairly quickly, so I’ll update you on what we decide to drink next…

As it stands, it’s 1.24am, and Obama has 103 votes against McCain’s 34 votes.  I’ve already done 4 shots, so have another 2 to go.  Better get started…!